Posted by admin | Posted in Q & A | Posted on 03-11-2009
We’ve been dating for a year and he is still sweet and all, but it jus doesn’t feel quite like it did when we started dating. I know he loves me, but I feel like he takes me for granted sometimes and is not so concerned about “impressing” me anymore. I can talk to him and tell him, and he’ll really try for a while, but then goes back to his old ways. Any ideas?
hahaha everyone i know has that problem, try going out some night and just sitting under the stars or something, the only way i know is to take a break and he’ll miss you ? its a temporary bandaid nothing permenent
Good luck
You are in a long term relationship. You cannot expect it to be like a new relationship. You both are comfortable now. You both let things slide and do not try as hard. This is the way that a real relationship works. Yes, he still needs to try to do sweet things for you, and try to impress you or surprise you at times, but no one can keep that going everyday. You need to first be more understanding, and grateful for the fact that your man is completely comfortable with you. If you want him to do something for you, then you first should do something for him if he still cares for you he will take the hint and return the favor.
This is nostalgia. You are asking for the impossible. He cannot make it the way it used to be, partly because your (and probably his) view of it has been idealized.
Enjoy your relationship as it matures. Sure, it is great to experience the beginnings of a relationship. But, there is no recapturing it with the same guy over and over again. And, there are good things about a mature relationship where the newness is over and the comfort of being with someone you trust grows.
stop doing whatever you have been doing.. stop trying your self.Ignore him and let him come to you..sounds kind of harsh but, if he cares about you he will come to you for once and appreciate you! Because you deserve it. Sometimes people get so used to people being nice or always there that they forget how much they really enjoy all the small things some one does for them . like maybe hes so used to you doing all the little impressing that I bet he has tooken you for granted..
This kind of happened to me last year..We weren’t in a relationship but, it was obvious that we liked each other but, at one point it felt like I was doing all the little gestures and stuff and he was not even really doing his part. I got a little pissed off and I just went a day with not going up to him and etc and the next day in the morning I see him walking down the hallway walking towards me. (he never comes early in the morning) He knew that he hurt my feelings and i think he kind of missed me..Sometimes people forget how much they truly enjoy some one tell their not there. From that day I stopped always coming to him and let him come to me once in awhile .It felt good:) I tihnk he had more respect for me too like I wasn’t kissing his butt (lol i know wierd term) ..you know what i mean though..
hope i could help
Well guys usually notice you more when you do a drastic makeover, or reinvent yourself with new clothes, new hair color, or new hairstyle. Then you need to seduce him and role play. Sometimes you may need to go some where else to make out, or just do something exciting and fun together. Try some new tricks or toys in the bedroom too!!! You just have to try to rekindle that old flame….or at least add a few more hot coals onto the fire!! Good luck and I hope this helps!!
He’s probably just comfortable with you now. He has you so he does feel like he has to impress you all of the time. Try the domino effect. Act the way you did at the beginning. He might think its cute and return the reaction. but don’t bring it up and be like why don’t you treat me the same? He’s just content now
You cant make him go back. All guys act sweet when they first get a girl. That’s just to get you hooked and after a while when they know they hav you they dont try as hard. It’s not like he’s bored of you or anything he just wants to lay back and not have worry about perfection.
its just the way it is
back then he had to impress you to get you
then he had to impress you to keep you
but now youve been there long enough that you know him and not what he built himself up to be a year ago
if he is still sweet be happy some guys turn into ***** after a year
it probably got old a little bit, not that exciting because he already has you.
but you can try like reminding him in cute ways.
just make your relationship exciting!
don’t push him though, he has to want to.
why would you want to MAKE him do it?
he should do it on his own!
good luck.
Is it possible you have been having sex with him?If so he knows he doesn’t have to “work to get it” any more.
Also if he is good to you, why are you complaining?Most girls would like to be in your shoes hon.
Say you’re dying from a compulsive illness that cannot be healed by any medicine created by any doctor that may heal you.
Usually, you never truly realise what you have, until you feel a threat that it will be gone for eternity…
oh honey it turns me on so much when you try to impress me , then have sex each night he does, with ENTHUSIASM while verbalizing how much it turns you on
men are simple creatures, associate what you at and what he wants
wen u 1st date sum1 its all new so u try harder to impress each otha and u luv each otha hEAPS and HEAPS!!! as time goes on you might get sick of each other, or ur growing out of each otha… but probably becoz uno each otha so well now u dnt try as hard
Tell him exactly what you said in there. u no i want u to be sweet, n ull try, but ull go back to ur old ways. Just be honest.
I wish you the best of bestest of luck! good luck susie
start to show less interest in him and more towards other guys and if he loves you that much then he will be more like the guy who you like.
ya dont be so stuck up.if he tryed then he dose love you .most guys would of left you if you said somthing like that to them
Play harder to get make him work for it.
you should be like remember how it was when we first started dating
Lick his prostate.
you cant change someone~~~he can only change himself
stick it in his pooper
In my experience a lot of guys do this at first they are like the greatest guy ever then they just seem like the get to comfy and they seem like the take you and your love for granted. i love my boyfriend but he does the same thing to bad my boyfriend knows i’m not going anywhere but i know a couple of people who have tried different ways of handling this issue.
my friend Sarah tried the whole talking thing and he tried and it would be like they were first dating again and then he’d just go back to be his old self. (i have this issue also) She tried telling him things have to change or i’m leaving… so things would change for a while and just right back to the old ways… Sarah even tried going ot her moms house for like 2wks here and there (they lived together) to make him see that she wasnt joking and then one day she came home and found him making out on the couch with another girl when she came home early from her moms… basically her telling him shes leaving made him feel like she was seeing someone else so he started seeing someone else and now they arent together anymore i’m not saying that this is the way to go just one way that this issue can get out of control. Sarah is a little bit of a drama queen and a little aggressive about things and her and Mike had tons in common but after leaving for like 2wks at a time for months and months. That could get old and cause more issues in the long run.
I talk to my boyfriend all the time and when i need something do now-a-days i try asking instead of telling that seems to work better with my boy. Like if i have to work i;ll be like “hey will you do dishes while i’m at work?” (my boy likes to put things off til the last min or if he can get me to say he can do it tomorrow he will try or if i forget he wont do it) if i come home and they are done i’ll be like oh babe thank you your the best… if not i’m like hey will you do the dishes right now please? Or in these case we make deals… like if you do the dishes i’ll make dinner or a snack or something. With food we try to do like ever other day he cooks then i cook… or we eat alot of oven pizza one of us will put in and the other will take it out.
I’d love to tell you that there’s a magic button to help you with this issue but there’s not… not at all! It’s just he’s comfortable with the way things are and it’s hard to get out of the rut. I’m at the point tho i have to get a little more aggressive with my boy about him being to comfy with me… (but he knows i could never leave him sadly he knows this)… but i’m thinking i’m going to be like “Look things need to start changing bc i cant take this anymore i’m getting tired of how things are going and i’m thinking of leaving i love you but something has to give